According to the Workbench website, I posted my last article on April 1, 2021. At that time the air was filled with opportunity. I had plans for events in the works, new articles ready for publishing, and traction starting on social media. However, I also was in my last few months of grad school, started a new job just a few days before after being mostly unemployed and in quarantine for the past 8 months, and was making plans to move from my tiny studio apartment. There was just too much on my plate at once and something had to go, so the Workbench went dark for a full year.
I didn’t like doing this. I felt guilty whenever people asked why I wasn’t writing or posting anymore, but even more so, I felt like I let the business down. It was this little baby that had to be constantly nurtured and fed to survive, and instead I just turned my back on it. This wasn’t a ‘what if’ project I had fun pretending to create. It itched in the back of my brain everyday. Everyday I came home from a difficult day at work. Everyday I woke up in my new home full of boxes. Everyday I stressed through finishing my exams, through getting COVID, through pushing myself to do more while also always feeling so exhausted. I thought that once I got this task done in front of me, then I could start working on the Workbench again, until something else arose.
This idea of ‘overdoing it’ is a regular fault I find in myself. In the past, I took every opportunity that would come my way, and wouldn’t realize how much I was putting on my plate until it cracked, and I would become overwhelmed with stress. This idea of understanding limits in life is so important, and something I don’t think is encouraged in our society as much as it should be. Especially in America, we are encouraged to constantly go. Always take what is in front of you because it will push you forward in life and you might not get the opportunity again. But when responsibilities start falling through the cracks, and your health and wellbeing becomes burdened, how can you continue to be successful in your work? How can you keep this running for long stretches of time? How can you find enjoyment in the work you love?
Because of this, I stopped making myself feel so guilty about putting a pause on the Workbench. Knowing my limit allows me to remain stable. And in many ways, I never stopped building the Workbench. In the past year, I held dinner parties, I grew a bountiful garden and preserved tons of food that I am still eating from, I met new people and gathered new ideas that excited me for what is to come. I read textbooks. I wrote. I got a second cat. All of these things are coming with me as we restart this journey.
We have some great projects in the works that I can’t wait to share with you all. My fantastic friend Serena Kujawski is a local Ayurveda Specialist, Esthetician, Yoga Instructor, and as of a few weeks ago, published poet. She will be writing many of the articles coming from our business. Come join us on this wellness journey. I’m looking forward to seeing what is in store.
